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My humorous thoughts about life.

"My Humorous and Helpful Thoughts About Teaching / Educational Resources for Your Classroom / Music and Random Fun"
Showing posts with label airplane. Show all posts
Showing posts with label airplane. Show all posts

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Theme Thursday: Inspiring Things

This week's Theme Thursday has given me a blog topic and an array of questions that need my wisdom. Let's give it a try, shall we?

Do you see inspiring things each day?

I'm not sure if I've seen anything inspiring today. Maybe outspiring, or whatever the opposite of that would be. I'd planned to fly to Dayton; however, just like Beth the alien traveler, we humans must also pick up headaches in Atlanta before going anywhere. The plane I was supposed to get on was running late and I was informed that I would miss my connections. So I had a choice... hmm... spend the night in a dumpy Atlanta hotel or reschedule for tomorrow. 

Am I supposed to feel inspired by that? Maybe so. I've created the best book characters from the lousiest people I've known and the worst situations too. If you ever treated me poorly, be afraid, be very afraid. And buy my book, after I talk someone into publishing it,  just to make sure you're not in it.


Do you wake up and hop out of bed then hurry to get ready to start your day?

Are you kidding me? This is summer. Why in the world would I hop out of something as delightful as my bed? If anything, I've recently stopped hopping because it sets my head spinning. Instead, I sit at the edge and wait for my blood pressure to rise enough to not get a carpet burn at the tip of my nose from keeling over. I'll leave the hopping to Kangaroo Jack. This movie was pretty bad in the stupid kind of way. I'd say it ties with Solaris. 


Even the actress fell asleep!
Have you seen Solaris? It had one funny scene. Someone asked George Clooney how a lady got on the space ship. He said, "I don't know. I just woke up and she was there."

My sister leaned into me and said, "I just woke up and she was there too." Yes, strangers, that is why we laughed hysterically in the middle of that boring movie.



What inspires you?


You do. Every time I get a comment where someone tells me I made them laugh, I am inspired to do it again. In fact, I am so inspired that I need to talk an agent into representing my book because I guarantee it will make kids laugh. After all, I've used a few of Bruce Coville's magic words in my book. "Fart." "Underwear." "Butt." Yes, folks, slap these words into kidlit and you've got an instant chuckle. If these words made you laugh too, don't admit it! 


Saturday, April 7, 2012

#AtoZ : Good Golly

In case you didn't read enough about my colonoscopy, here's more. First, we drove to the Surgery Center and parked near signs like this:



Which made no sense because patients undergoing procedures aren't allowed to drive. 

Next, I headed to the reception desk where the lady asked me to show ID, as if someone is going to fake being me so they can have a probe stuck up their butt. After a short sleep, all was fine.

Then I came home and watched Helen Hayes in Airport. Classic! Good golly, the world has changed. A lady stows away on an airplane by saying, "My son lost his wallet," while a man kung fu grips a bomb in a brief case onto a plane without screening nor questioning. Next, a pilot argues with the aircraft control, and they listen to him. Plus, a lady cuts in line to ask a question and gets a polite answer from smiling airport staff! Good golly.

Personally, Airport was good, but I like the remake better. Airplane!




Saturday, October 29, 2011

Silly Sunday: Repairs


After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a 'gripe sheet,' which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. Mechanics correct problems and document repairs on form.

Here are maintenance complaints submitted by UPS ' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S). 
 

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.

S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

*


P: Something loose in cockpit

S: Something tightened in cockpit

*


P: Dead bugs on windshield.

S: Live bugs on back-order.

*


P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.

S: Evidence removed.

*


P: DME volume unbelievably loud.

S: DME volume set to more believable level.

*


P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.

S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

*


P: Suspected crack in windshield.

S: Suspect you're right.

*


P: Number 3 engine missing.

S: Engine found on right wing after brief search

*


P: Aircraft handles funny. 

S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

*


P: Target radar hums.

S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

*


P: Mouse in cockpit.

S: Cat installed.

*


P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.

S: Took hammer away from midget

Friday, July 1, 2011

Fireworks

Happy Independence Day week-end! It's been 235 years since our country was founded and the most popular American fourth of July tradition is fireworks. Many of us gather around to see shows from the ground, but have you ever wondered what fireworks look like from an airplane? I imagined bright bouquets of color filling up the window, but that's not it at all.

Years ago, my husband pointed out the window of an airplane and said, "Look. Fireworks."

"Where?" I asked.

After scanning the skies, I finally spotted a quarter shaped explosion, followed by several other mini light displays. Sure, it was cool but not what I expected. In reality, planes fly much higher than exploding fireworks, so just like everything else from above, the light display shrunk.

Even with today's technology, I've never seen a film or still photo that captures the true beauty of fireworks, but here's a short clip which I enjoyed.